A cautionary tale for men all around the world

Fellas, let’s face it, we are very ego driven.  It’s just our nature, and it’s something that we have to continuously work hard at to control.  It’s like animal instinct or something close, but our ego will override our common sense without fail if we don’t exhibit some semblance of control.

The perfect example of that comes from the city of Gigante, Colombia.  In this city, there is a 66  year old man who is now missing a very significant part of his anatomy.  If he’s feeling a bit less of a man now, I can completely understand it.  I’m going to go out on a limb here, but I’m going to say that he let his ego get away from him one time too many.

GIGANTE, Colombia, Sept. 19 (UPI) — A man from southern Colombia had to have his penis amputated after he allegedly overdosed on the erectile disfunction medication Viagra, officials said.

The 66-year-old man from Gigante, whose name has not been released, told a local newspaper that he intentionally overdosed on Viagra to impress his new girlfriend, Colombia Reports reported Wednesday.

I really feel bad for the guy in a sense, but you can’t intentionally overdose on something and not expect bad things to happen.  Even things that are good and healthy for you can be potentially damaging or deadly if taken in excessive amounts.

*WARNING TO ALL MEN:  The following discussion may bring about onset of pain and/or discomfort to your manhood.  Tread carefully!!!

According to the news account, “the penis-enhancing drug caused the man, who said he was a former member of the Gigante municipal council, to experience a constant state of erection for several days, the report said. He then sought medical help.”  Now, the drug itself has a warning to seek medical help if you have an erection lasting more than 4 hours, and that is with the RECOMMENDED dose.  Why would you wait several days suffering from priapism?  I can’t answer for all other men even though they will likely agree, but you can graze the penis with anything above the force of a feather drop, and that pain is enough to send a man to seek help.  Don’t believe me???

Once the doctors examined him, they found that his johnson was inflamed, fractured, and gangrene had began to set in.  I’m betting you likely had the same reaction I did when I read the story.  I saw inflamed and said oww.  I saw gangrene and said ewwww.  I had to double back to verify that I had indeed saw “fractured” though.  Honestly, until today, I had no idea that you could fracture your penis.  When it happens, you’re likely to hear it crack and see it turn purple or some other awful color because of the internal bleeding.  Imagine having to explain that one to your boss when you call out sick.  “Hello Dave, I can’t make it into work today.  I broke my package, and it will be in a cast for about 6-8 weeks.  I have a doctor’s note if you need one.”

***Not an actual penis as I would not post such a photo here. I imagine that if they can make a cast for a single finger, then Mr. Johnson should be able to get one if he gets broken.

In all seriousness though, take good care of yourself and your body will take care of you.  When you get to that point that the joint doesn’t work like it used to, treat him like an NFL Hall of Famer.  Make a bronze cast of him, sit that casting on the fireplace mantle, and dedicate a plaque to him detailing all his conquests and victories.  Don’t include stats as that will likely get you into trouble.  When all else fails, don’t let your ego lead you down a dead-end alley with no room to turn around.  It will always end up badly for you.

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4 thoughts on “A cautionary tale for men all around the world

  1. I would like to know where he stood on women’s issues. Like, is this karma? Because us rational people know that karma is a bitch if you’re a bitch.

    Like

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